Friday Thought : We can do hard things

Mr Moore (my district superintendent) dropped the above plaque off the other day. Then, he told me its origin story.

And its origin is April Wavra (a teacher in my school).

Several years ago, when Brad Barringer was principal, he was sharing some ideas with Mrs Wavra, and because she was listening - truly listening - she heard the above statement. Then, she made a plaque for Brad. When Mr Moore saw it, he requested she make several more. 

And now, they are dotted throughout our district, in homes, offices, and classrooms, encouraging others and reminding us all that we can do hard things. 

So often I believe that the "fruits of my labor" means something coming back to me, a reward for my work, a profit for my labor. I was recently reminded, however, that so often the fruits of our labor are rarely seen, heard, or noticed. Because they benefit others. Which is great! Because it is multiplying well beyond ourselves. 

If we are the sole beneficiary of our labors, the fruit stops with us. It is done.

If it blesses others, however, the fruits of our labor are endless and immeasurable. It grows and multiplies beyond our reach. 

Thank you, Mrs Wavra, for listening to Brad, for taking the time and energy to make something beautiful, and for blessing him. Years later, the fruits of your labor continue to grow and produce and remind us that doing hard things - doing the right thing - never goes unnoticed. It impacts, inspires, and changes people. 

And sometimes, we are fortunate enough to notice. 

Friday Thought : Be a Greater Fool!

My family and I just finished watching season 1 of Newsroom. The last episode was entitled, "The Greater Fool" and centered around the main character, Will McAvoy (played by Jeff Daniels) who was suffering from depression because of an article that was published about him, calling him "The Greater Fool." In response, he self-medicates (which triggers a bleeding stomach ulcer) and doubts his abilities, and his worth. He expresses a desire to quit, largely because the article isn't wrong. "They're right!" he yells at his trusted coworker, "this piece was right about everything."

Although we - the audience - never fully know what the article is "right" about, we know a little, as Will McAvoy quotes it by heart, "Will wants to change the world and hates that the world has changed." And because of that, they think him arrogant and pompous. Which he is. Or was, anyway.

And that’s what made him great, what allowed him to inspire change and move hearts, and it’s exactly what his coworkers want him to be: the Greatest Fool.

This is why, as Will struggles to regain confidence and purpose, a coworker confronts him, "The Greater Fool is actually an economic term," she says, "For the rest of us to profit, we need the Greater Fool" because "the Greater Fools is someone with the perfect blend of self-delusion and ego, to think that he can succeed where others have failed. This whole country was made by Greater Fools." 

Near the end of the episode, Will asks a young intern why she wants to work for the Newsroom. "I watch the show and I read the article," she responds. "I know what a Greater Fool is, and I want to be one."

While watching, I couldn't help but think of educators around the world who show up each day believing THEY can make a difference, that they can help that child or connect with that kid, that they can improve a student’s learning or change their lives, even when nobody ever has. Educators believe we can succeed in changing the world! 

We too are arrogant, we too are confident and at times even pompous because our students need us to be! How else do you show up, day after day with hope and belief that we - our students, our staff, our school - are better today than yesterday? How else do you show up year after year planning for and believing we will impact hearts and change lives? There is no other way but to be a Greater Fool.

I know what a Greater Fool is, and I am proud to be one. More importantly, I know what a group of Greater Fools looks like, and I am thankful to work among them. 

Thank you for being a Greater Fool.

(Sidenote . . . we did a brief competition of what a group of Greater Fools would be called . . . are we a herd? A flock?)

Here are my two favorite suggestions:

• Pace pr Drove (which are both names for a group of donkeys, which is brilliant!)

• Fooliaminy

That’s what I’ve been thinking about this week.

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Friday Thought : Don't Take it Personal. Make it Personal

"Don't take it personal, make it personal."

I gave this advice to a fellow principal a few weeks back. "If we take it personally,” I said, “we get defensive. If we make it personal, we take action. We do what is best."

As educators, we are in the business of taking action, doing what is best for staff and students, and helping others succeed. The problem is, this profession is so personal!

We give up time with our family, pour into other people's kids before our own, and sacrifice COUNTLESS of unpaid hours so that OTHERS may flourish. 

Only we know how much time we spend planning, thinking, and worrying about our profession, our students, so when we are criticized, scolded, offered unsolicited suggestions, or overhear/read unflattering comments about who we are and what we do, it is difficult to not be offended.

When a parent yells or accuses of not caring for their child, we take it personally.

When a Facebook group rants about the decisions we’ve made, we take it personally.

When students refuses to work in our class or asks to be moved from our classroom, we take it personally. 

And when we take it personal, we get defensive. When we get defensive, oftentimes, we lean towards making decisions that are best for us, for our ego, rather than what is best for the parent, the student, the situation.

I know I do, anyway. Because I care so much about what I do and about who I serve, because I know the sacrifices my family makes - the sacrifices I make - whenever I am challenged or criticized, whenever my intention are questioned it is easy for me to get take it personally, to get defensive.

It is easy for me to easily fall into the trap of protecting me.

But then, I am reminded of truths such as this: "A society grows great when old men plant trees whose shade they know they will never sit in." Said another way, a society grows great when people care more about others than they do themselves. Which, as an educator, is exactly what you do, each and every day.

When we take it personal we get defense, we point the finger, and complain that there is no shade. When we make it personal we take action. We plant trees.

That is what I've been thinking about - and wrestling with - this past week: "Don't take it personal, make it personal."

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Friday Thought : Resume vs Eulogy Virtues

In his book, The Road to Character, David Brooks writes about the difference between Resume virtues and Eulogy virtues.

“Eulogy virtues,” he writes, "are the virtues that get talked about at your funeral, the ones that exist at the core of your being – whether you are kind, brave, honest or faithful; what kind of relationships you formed.”

“Resume virtues,” on the other hand, are much shallower. “They are the skills that you bring to the job market and that contribute to external success."

When we pursue our resume virtues, we set out to conquer the world. When we hold tight to our eulogy virtues, we battle for opportunities to serve the world. 

And that got me thinking about educators and why we have chosen, and continue to choose, this beautiful profession.

Most educators came into this profession because, at some point, someone spoke into our lives. Because someone took time out of their day to spend time in ours, because they lived a life that inspired us to help, to serve, and to improve the lives of those around us. I bet you are here because someone chose to see beyond their resume virtues and chose to invest in their eulogy virtues.

People who, as David Brooks writes, “radiate a sort of moral joy.”

They answer softly when challenged harshly. They are silent when unfairly abused. They are dignified when others try to humiliate them, restrained when others try to provoke them. But they get things done. They perform acts of sacrificial service with the same modesty everyday spirit they would display if they were just getting the groceries. They are not thinking about what impressive work they are doing. They are not thinking about themselves at all. They just seem delighted by the flawed people around them. They just recognize what needs doing and they do it” (bolding and emphasis added).

Like many, I have ambition. I have dreams and ideas of how I would like my life and career to go, and I work hard to ensure that they will happen. I am constantly working on my resume.

This week, however, I was once again reminded that if I accomplish all that my little heart desires, if I gain all the accolades and can stand on a stage to great applause, it will mean nothing without a strong eulogy resume.

For in the end, that is what this profession - this life - is all about.

That’s what I’ve been thinking about this week.

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Friday Thought : Leadership is Simple. Make a "To be" list.

A few days ago, an old teacher of mine reached out. She was struggling with her building principal and was sharing how she was feeling alone and unsupported. “I mean,” she said in a moment of exasperation, “Leadership is simple. Not easy, but simple.”

“How so?” I asked.

“Support your people,” she replied.

And I have not been able to get that out of my head. As a principal, father, husband, and friend.

Dan Allender defines a leader as “anyone who wrestles with an uncertain future on behalf of others - anyone who uses her gifts, talents, and skills to influence the direction of others for the greater good.”

Which means, everyone is a leader. Everyone. Yet, so often we miss our opportunities to lead, influence others, and make an impact toward the greater good because we’re distracted by being busy. Which, according to Allander, is the moral equivalent to laziness.

Being busy seems like the polar opposite of laziness, but a busy person is not so much active as lost. A lazy person does little to nothing while a busy person does almost everything, but the similarity is that both refuse to be intentional.

They refuse to be courageous.

Courageous to step into hard conversations with their staff, spouse, children, or friends.

Courageous to be open about their struggles, failures, and gaps in abilities.

Courageous to step into situations of vulnerability.

I know I’m guilty of this.

When I get busy with projects and tasks I can accomplish a lot of things, making myself feel productive, needed, and important. So too does my exhaustion. “I worked so hard today,” I can say to myself as I doze onthe couch while my kiddos clean up after dinner.

And I did. I accomplished a lot. But did I lead or support anyone?

Now, I know you might be saying, “Getting that to-do list IS supporting your staff, family, or community.” And it is. But, like most things, it is also incomplete. If I spend my entire day on my to-do list, I accomplish a lot but miss out on so much more. I miss out on wrestling with the uncertain future of others.

Recently, alongside my “to-do” list, I have added a “to-be” list.

The tasks on my to-do list are menial. They keep the building or house in order, and running smoothly. The items on my to-be list are the important conversations or interactions I must have in order for the greater good to be accomplished - they are the things that remind us what we’re here for! They are not the things I must do but the HOW I must do them.

Things like:

To be present in my conversations, not looking at my phone or thinking of the things that need to get done.

To be purposeful in my gratitude and acknowledgment of others.

To be mindful of stories told so I can remember them, refer to them later, and understand those around me better.

To be patient with the struggling kindergartner knowing full well he does not come from a healthy home.

To be silent with my children, allowing them space to share their hearts rather quickly jumping in and “solving” their problems.

To-do lists provide those we lead with the things they want.

To-be lists provide them with the things they need: intentionality, purpose, and courage. To-be lists require us to stop doing They require us to be human. And for many of us - for me for sure - that is what makes them so difficult.

It’s also what makes leadership most rewarding. Because it allows us to lead, walk with, and be guided by others as we all continually strive toward the greater good.

That’s what I’ve been thinking about this week.

Happy Friday!

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Friday Thought : Keep Knocking

Several years ago, this letter was sent to one of my teachers. It now hangs, laminated, on the wall next to her computer. Recently, she pulled it down and showed it to me. Then, she told me the story.

This young man was not a great student. In fact, he was a terrible student. Be she loved him, worked with and never gave up on him, even when he didn’t show much growth or change - all year long.

Nor the following year.

Nor the next.

Nor the next.

Then, almost ten years later, the above letter arrived in the mail.

My friend has a phrase, "Just keep knocking." And he reminded me of it again the other day. I shared with him how frustrated I was with a particular student, that no matter what I did or said, I was not getting through. "Maybe it isn't your job to 'get through,'" he said, "Maybe all you need to do is just keep knocking," he said.

And I like that.

Sometimes, it isn't our job to solve the issue. Sometimes we are not the ones who will make the breakthrough. Sometimes all we are tasked with doing is knocking. Over and over and over again.

We can't force people out of bed or off the couch. Nor can we make them answer the door. But we can keep knocking. Which, for many, is precisely what they need - the constant thud of someone knocking on the door, reminding them that they matter, that someone cares, and that they are not alone.

Because here’s what I know to be true:

If we stop knocking, they will never open the door. If we never stop, they might.

And if we knock long enough, I am convinced that they eventually will. And when that happens, it will all be worth it.

Even if it takes ten years.

Thank you, *teacher*, for knocking.

That’s what I’ve been thinking about this week.

Happy Friday!

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Friday Thought : When Tired or Frustrated, Remember to Play.

When Keith Jarrett sat down to play the piano in front of 1,400 people, he expected disaster. The piano was not what he ordered for such a grand concert. Nor was it in tune or in good shape: some of the keys didn’t work and the foot pedals stuck. Which is why, initially, he refused to play.

But then, he did. Because 17-year-old Vera Brandes asked him to.

At the time, Brandes was Germany’s youngest concert promoter and she had done all that she could do to get everything right. And now, with eager spectators starting to line up at the door, she needed him to play.

So he did.

“I will do this for you,” he said. Then, turning to his producer, he requested that they record the session for an example to others of what they would get if his demands were not met. He knew it was going to be a disaster, and he wanted it recorded. As an example.

Instead, by the end of the night, what they had was Keith Jarrett’s best ever selling album, the best selling solo jazz album, and the best selling solo piano album of all time!

Instead of a disaster, he produced a masterpiece. All because he was willing to look like a fool.

I first heard this album a little over six years ago during a city walk through a Chinese city. Years later, after listening, analyzing, and drawing inspiration from this album, this story, three takeaways continue to rise to the surface.

1. No matter what, Try.
   Although simple and perhaps more than a bit cliché, one of the most important decisions we can continually make is to try. This isn’t new for anyone to hear, especially in the world of education. But another more profound and less commonly understood consequence of trying is this: When we try and when we fail, we allow others to grow.

   This week, I tried running a two-day event of PLAY for our students and staff, and although many things went well, there was also more than a few blunders - all of which were my fault. In the midst of it all, however, people rose to the occasion, displaying their gifts and talents in ways previously unknown, and earning the respect of their peers. My failures allowed others to rise.

   If we don’t try we don’t fail.
   And when we don’t fail, we steal opportunities for others to shine.

   When we embrace our limitations - out loud and in the open - we allow others to exercise their strengths and abilities, we provide the opportunity for the right people in the right place, and we create a stronger, better product. We develop a better team.

   And often times, these discoveries only come when we try new things, when we allow ourselves opportunities to fail, and when we provide space for others to rise.
   

2. “I will do it for you.”
   Some of the most destructive events of our world have come at the hands of those considering only themselves. The most beautiful and influential, people and moments however, have come from those who have considered others before themselves. They look at life, at difficulties and struggles as opportunities to love on and help others, rather than defending what is theirs and looking out for number one (think Nelson Mandela, Sojourner Truth, and on especially on Easter weekend, Jesus Christ). These men and women did not slink into the shadows when trials and tribulations came, they leaned into them, embraced them, endured them. All for the benefit of others.

   So too did Keith Jarrett.

   When Keith Jarrett stepped onto the stage, when he sat before the less-then-sufficient piano and slammed his fingers into the keys so that all could hear, he wasn’t considering himself. He was thinking of a 17-year old girl who needed his help. And created a masterpiece.

   As an educator, when times are difficult, when the season of winter seems to drag on forever, when administrators forget what it’s like to be a teacher, when parents complain, students slouch, and deadlines approach - when we just cant seem to muster up the energy to try any harder - it is then that we must look into the eyes of those we are responsible for, those whom we have influence over, and think to ourselves or say out loud, “I will do this for you.”

   Then, we must get to work.
   

3. Break Routine.
   If Keith Jarrett had received the piano he wanted I’m sure the evening still would have been a success. It was the break in routine, however, that allowed him to create something truly special.

   Routines are important. They allow us to create habits that, overtime, can produce purposeful and quality results (think practicing a musical instrument, working out, or working diligently on writing a book). They provide safety and develop consistency.

   They can also make us blind. Blind to new ways of thinking, better ways of living, and the beauties of life. Routines hold tight to “the way we’ve always done it” and are fearful of change. They lull us into desiring comfort rather than growth.

   A break in routine, however, forces change. And change, although difficult and often uncomfortable, produces growth. But only if we embrace it.

As an educator, father, and husband, there are times and seasons of times where it feels like I am just going through the motions. That what I am doing seems dull, that my passion and excitement for the beautiful gift of educating students, raising children, or loving my wife seems exhausting, not exciting, and that all the time and effort put in day in and day out, seems to amount to nothing.

I know we’re not supposed to say that, but it’s true. For me at least.

Which is why I listen to Keith Jarrett’s Koln concert, because when it comes on in the morning or randomly throughout the day (classical music and soundtracks play in my office all day, every day), I am reminded to keep trying, to do it for others, and to - when needed - find ways to break my routine and fight the temptation to remain in comfort.

Our attempts may not always produce a masterpiece, and in truth, it is more likely that it won’t. But refusing to play the broken piano will produce nothing.

This week, amidst frustrations, fears of failure, and exhaustion, I have been encouraged to play the piano.

Happy Good Friday!!!

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Friday Thought : "What's best for the student?" Pictures and Stories.

A few days ago, when discussing options to a difficult situation, my boss asked, me, “What’s best for the student?”

With that simple question, she eliminated so much confusion and consternation, as well as all excuses. No longer were my feelings or wants part of the discussion, nor anyone else’s, just the needs of the student. And within a short while, we had a solution to our problem.

There are many motivators in life that inspire or encourage us in our decision making. The most common being rooted in selfish ambition and vain conceit - whatever makes life easiest, whatever makes us look or feel better, makes us popular or liked, and whatever allows for personal advancement. And the problem with these foundational motivators is not only that they produce comfort rather than growth, its that they are decisions that willingly sacrifice the needs and growth of others.

And we are all guilty of it. At least I know I am. Which is why I truly appreciate a boss who grounds me back to why we are here and do what we do: to love and support kids.

Its also why the above picture is so important because it is a powerful reminder to me, to us - educators, leaders, parents, adults - that we are here in our positions for the purpose of helping, guiding, and training those who need helping, guiding, and training.

We are here to help others.

Pictures of our kiddos hanging on the wall can help remind and reground us. So too can unexpected visits.

Inspired by the above picture and conversations with my boss, I have recently been inviting high school students to come back to our elementary and share a few of their favorite stories. “Whatever you remember,” I tell them, “be it funny, sad, or seemingly insignificant, just share a few of your favorite memories from elementary.”

One student shared about the time he and his friend (the son of one of my students) got in trouble for drawing the male anatomy in the snow during recess.

Another student shared about the time she was struggling and a teacher knelt down to her level, affirmed and encouraged her, then hugged her. Tears flooded her eyes as she expressed how important that moment was for her, then and now.

Others simply shared how teachers made them feel. How they loved their classes not because of the content but because of them, the teacher.

Like pictures on a wall, hearing the stories of our recently departed students has been a tangible reminder that in the midst of data discussions, state testing requirements, and exhausting weeks of hard conversations, there are students in our classrooms who need to be loved and supported. There are students who are showing up with heavy hearts, distracted minds, and empty bellies. There are students who are coming to our school who, that very day, will encounter a moment that will stick with them for the rest of their lives.

And that, more than anything else, should be enough to inspire us into hard conversations and purposeful solutions.

To paraphrase Andy Jacks in Discipline Win, Our legacy is defined by how we support our students. They are the reason why we are here and the WHY to our decisions, and it is therefore they who should be plastered on our walls and the forefront of our minds. Not ourselves.

“What’s best for the student?” my boss asked me. Recently, the answer has been to remind myself and my staff that at the heart of everything we say and do, it is our students who will suffer the consequences or reap the benefits of our decision making.

And that, for me at least, has been a much needed grounding and what has been on my mind lately.

Happy Friday!!!

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Friday Thought : The "Drive-Through School Days." A time to dig in and cover ground.

“This is my favorite time of year,” one of my teachers recently told me, “because it’s when you really begin to see the growth and development of students, and that is so rewarding!”

Typically, the days between January through mid March are considered the doldrums of education. There are very few major holidays to celebrate which in turn means very few days off, parties, and “things to look forward to.” There’s just time.

Which, if embraced, can make it the most productive and most memorable time of the year! But only if we are intentional, like a good road trip, and take advantage of those “drive-through states.”

My family loves road trips. And each summer, on our way to some far-off destination, we have a stretch of time where very little is accomplished but wracking up the miles. We start early and drive late, stop as little as possible, crank up the music, and talk. We spend time together. And after years of this routine, with a bucket full of memories and destinations reached, what we think about and miss the most on any given day is the time spent in the car.

Our schools and classrooms should be no different.

As our students look towards the next destination of spring, spring break, and the coming summer, take advantage of these “drive-through school days” by digging in and covering ground. Of your content for sure, but also of your students, your staff.

On Instruction:

When it comes to instruction, embrace the long road ahead. Consistency builds routines, and with it comes the opportunity to push a little harder and go a little further. Like those long stretches of road without stop lights, rest stops, or distractions, where we can set the cruise to 75, 80, and at times even 85 (because there is nothing to brake for), so too can our attention to instruction be.

Once we’ve reestablished the expectations of our classrooms, we can up our game a bit, push a little harder, and travel a little further. We can cover ground! And I don’t know about you, but when I arrive at my destination several minutes before the GPS’s “estimated time of arrival,” I feel like I’ve won the Daytona 500. My kids do too because arriving early means an opportunity to explore the campground or jump in the lake. It means time to play.

Cannot our schools and classrooms do the same? Can we not take advantage of routines, amp up our cruise control, and cover ground?

Then, when we arrive at our destination early, can we not provide opportunities for our students - and ourselves - to explore? To play?

On Relationships:

On our road trips, the “drive-through states” also provide us a unique opportunity to be with our kids. The seating arrangement becomes a musical chairs of sorts, allowing various combinations of conversations and activities. Sometimes, thought, we sit in silence. At other times we blare music, with each kiddo and parent taking their turn choosing a song. At all times, however, we are together. And often times, it is these days, with nothing going on and no adventure to explore that we love and miss the most.

For our schools, our classrooms, these days are no different.

There’s a podcast I listen to called, The Second Question and it’s host, Martin Silverman, is a principal in Texas. He ends each episode by asking his guest who their most inspirational teacher was. And almost systematically, the answer will sound something like this: “I don’t remember anything they taught me, but what I do remember . . .” And then they will speak - in detail - about a moment where the teacher invested in them, took notice of them, and spoke into their lives. These moments, as far as I can tell, never occur during a Christmas concert or holiday party. They occur during normal and unnoteworthy days, where “nothing is going on.” Nothing except teachers showing up, being intentional about their time, and investing in their students.

These coming “drive-through school days” are the days you will see your students and staff most consistently, with minimal interruptions. Are you taking advantage of it? Are you showing up with intentionality and purpose?

Because how we spend these days determines how we arrive at our final destination.

We take pictures of monumental occasions, post them on our Instagram, and hang them on our walls. But it the journey, the unique moments and unplanned events and conversations along the way that we end up talking about around campfires and remembering most in the years that follow. It is the routine of showing up and being present, day-after-day, that connects us with those around us, that inspires change, and impacts lives. It is the journey, not the destination, that matters most.

How are you spending your time with your drive-through days?

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Friday Thought : The October Double Stretch!

As an educator, we there is a routine to how the year goes.

August is a shedding of summer. Like a snake shedding its skin, we spend the first few days/weeks of school shedding off old habits and creating new ones.

September is paving the road. In preparation for the year, the journey ahead, we spend a great deal of time in September installing and ensuring norms and procedures for our kiddos. Learning is still happening, just as people can still travel during road construction, it just isn’t smooth yet because the road isn’t fully paved. Just like learning in the month of September.

November is kicked off by a Halloween celebration. Then, it seems, everyone is in a progressive shutdown mode for Christmas break. With the invasion of holidays and Christmas concerts, class parties and the like, there just never seems to be a full week of intense, all-out instruction,

Which is why we have October.

In the month of October, the road is finally paved and there are minimal interruptions. It is a perfect month for a Double Stretch.

At times, we need to put forth a little extra, reach slightly further, and endure a little more. Our bodies are used to this. Like when we need to reach for that jar of cookies or box of Mac and Cheese that is just out of reach, somehow, we reach a little further and grab it! We double stretch.

For the month of October, find ways to give just a little bit more. As an educator you already give a lot, but where can you stretch slightly further? We can’t always live like this, with our arms and minds and bodies stretched to its fullest, but we can every now and then. October is one of those “then’s.”

Where can you put forth a bit more in your lesson? In an activity that you’ve been thinking about doing? In a relationship with a student or staff? Where can you improve your own mind or heart by giving just a bit more this month? How can you improve someone else’s life by doing just a bit extra?

Where can you double stretch this month?

Friday Thought : Leave it at the Door

This week, gratitude and generosity have been on my mind. Especially when times are hard or seem extremely bleak, it is hard to be grateful or full of generosity because, really, we’re just trying to survive, to put food on the table, and to not cry in front of the kids.

How do we move on from these moments of sadness? From these pits of despair?

I don’t know. But ensuring others don’t feel the same and trying to make them feel seen and heard and loved - even if just for a moment, sometimes seems to help. Not fully, not completely, but a little. It helps to know we’re helping.

This is what teachers do, almost daily. They give of themselves by leaving their shit at the door and loving the hell out of their students. They give, even when their marriages are a mess, their homes are in chaos, and their lives seems to be falling apart. Because that’s what quality teachers do. And as educational leaders, we must therefore work even harder to ensure that they are replenished, that they feel loved, appreciated, and known. We must fill them up.

Friday Thought : The Least of These

A slide from the same presentation by Dr. Andy Jacks (@_AndyJacks)

This, roughly, is a quote from this past weekend. "Your school should be judged by the way it treats the least of these."

It is often said that great teachers - great schools - make their decisions based upon their best students, teachers. And I fully stand by that. When we create lesson plans, when we consider the future of our school, it is the best students, the best teachers, that dictate what we will and won’t do, can and can’t do. We make decisions based on the top students and teachers, not the least common denominator.

And this is where the above quote convicted and challenged me this past week, because I desperately want my school to be considered the best, to lead the state and the nation in academics and excellence! Yet, ultimately, that is not how we will be judged, how we should be judged. If we have the highest GPA’s and ACT score but graduate jerks and kids who are not considerate of others, we have failed. And everyone will know it.

How we treat those kids who are at the bottom of the social ladder (be it academic, financial, popularity, whatever) is what defines us as a person, and us as a school. Do we spend extra time on some kids, and less on others? Do we send some parents emails and neglect others? Are we kinder, more patient with some kids and not with others?

If we’re honest, or at least if I am, the answer is yes. At least sometimes, anyway, and not because I like one kid more than another or because I think one has more value than another. But because, largely, the kids who have better home lives, more supportive parents, or more stable living conditions (generally) work harder, are more polite, and are better students. They’re easier to work with. Easier to spend time with. But they're also the ones that need us and our resources more.

“Are you spending as much time being concerned about and brainstorming ways to help a child’s behavior as you are a child’s reading or math scores?” This was another question posed, and I thought it a perfect distinction, or manifestation rather, of how we can love each child equally, yet differently, and according to their needs.

Perhaps you’ve heard the phrase, “Maslow before Bloom.” If not, it is simply implying that before we can work a child through the increasing stages of Bloom’s Taxonomy, we must first consider Maslow and the basic needs that each child must have in order to live. 

Just today, I saw this play out with a particular student who bombed a test. And I mean he BOMBED it. When he and it were brought to my attention, the student spent a good deal of time explaining the morning he had had the day of the test and how that difficulty, that upheaval of a morning affected his day and ability to work. We then spent a little bit of time discussing his emotions, his normal morning life, and how he could have handled those frustrations in the near future.  We spent time working through his Maslow needs: safety and love and belonging. And it only took about 10ish minutes.

Then, he retook the test and it was RADICALLY different. 

As teachers, as educators, we must always be pushing our students to achieve great things. We must never settle for mediocrity or ordinary - we aim towards and teach towards the best! But we also equally love on and support those who, for one reason or another, cannot achieve such great heights because their foundation of life - their basic needs - are absent or threatened. We reach and teach those kids, too.

We didn’t come to be teachers to serve and teach to the best of the best, but to change lives, to inspire lives worth living, and to improve the world around. Sometimes that means pushing the extremes of Bloom’s higher levels of Taxonomy. Other times, it is working through Maslow before attacking Bloom because that is what that kid needs, and because that is what we can provide. That’s why they call us teachers!

Although it is hard work, exhausting work, and at times extremely frustrating, it is the best work. 

It is a great time to be an Educator.

Friday Thought : They Make Us Better

Today, Thursday, was a bit rough.

With so many kids out for the Divisional Volleyball , I had great plans to get a LOT done. I even told myself on my walk to work, "It's going to be a quiet day!!!" Ten minutes after the morning bell, I had four kids in my office and I found myself barking at and getting extremely frustrated with the four often-times-offending culprits. What is so hard about following directions? I thought to myself, “How hard is it to be kind? Polite?” I said out loud and a bit louder than I intended.

Then, the volleyball team lost their third game to Augusta - a team they should have beaten handedly in three - and I was reminded of when I was a coach and how much I dreaded "easy" games because I knew, in many ways, those were the ones we could very easily lose because we just assumed we would win. I also dreaded those games because, as a team, we rarely got better. Often we got worse, and the ease with which we would score or steal the ball or rebound would enforce a false belief of how good we were. Difficult games, however, hard fought matches or underdog wins would do the complete opposite. They would force us to play harder, to fine-tune and fix the smallest of mistakes, to overcome our mental and physical exhaustion, and to work hard. Those games made us better. Better athletes, better coaches, and an overall better team.

I think the same could be said for teaching, principaling, and living in general.

Whenever something is easy (be it a class, a kid, or a goal), I can get lazy, complacent, or downright unmotivated because really all I have to do is show up and things will pretty much take care of themselves. (Maybe you can relate to this?) But when the obstacle or goal is tough, when the class is rowdy, the students are difficult, or the opponent extremely talented, I try my best. I get up earlier, plan for a few extra hours if not days in advance, and create a detailed plan of attack. In short, I rise to the occasion. I get better. (Maybe you can relate to this?)

You may have a particular grade or class that is hard, you probably have several students who grate on you and make each day difficult, and I can almost guarantee that with each looming break (Christmas and summer), kids get extra squirrelly, our patience a bit thin, and classes a bit more chaotic.

I also know it's all about perspective.

At the very least, these kids have the potential to make us better.They will require us to bring our best game, to consider new schemes and teaching practices, and they will force us to continually learn how to love and like people - to do what is best for people - even when we don't feel like it. In other words, they will make us better teachers, better leaders, and better people. Which, in turn, will allow us to teach and lead and inspire more people.

These are the victories that stay with use for years to come. Not the easy ones, the expected ones. It’s the hardest ones. Just like our volleyball girls who, yet again, took their rivals - the defending divisional and state champions to a five-game match and won!

These are the games that we remember. These are the games that make us better. Just like those difficult classes, those difficult students, and those difficult weeks. When we rise to the occasion, when we look on them as opportunities to improve and get better, we do! Then and only then, do we find ourselves at the end of the day, week, year holding on to memories that last a lifetime. Victories of changed and inspired lives. Victories that remind us of the very reason we became educators in the first place.

And that is an encouraging thought.

For more on . . .

-N- Stuff  :  Open Thoughts  :  Friday Thoughts

Friday Thought : "I want to be a teacher."

"I want to be a teacher."

Two students have said this to me in the past week. Two. And neither of them could articulate a subject or grade they wish to teach. They just know they want to be a teacher.

Which could only mean one thing. We have a pretty amazing group of teachers.

Think about what they're saying, what they're implying by that statement! They know you work hard, that you get paid just over a pile of dog doodoo, and that you are in fact never fully or appropriately appreciated for the work you do. Yet, they want to be like you. They want to be a teacher.

They want to be helpful, brave, fun, exciting, kind, respectful, a person of character, hardworking, inspiring, comforting, smart, RESILIENT, full of purpose, and the million other things all of you are! They look at you, they watch you, in all the muck and mire that surrounds your job, they see how you respond to it all, and they think, "I want to be like them. I want to be a teacher."

Not, "I want your car", or "your long summer vacations", or anything superficial. No, want to be what you are. They want to be like you. THEY WANT TO BE A TEACHER!!!

I just don't know if there is anything more praising or gratifying than that.

It may seem at times that you're beating your head against the wall or dragging kids across the finish line, because you are:) But you're also modeling and teaching our kiddos what it means to make a difference. What it means to be a man or woman of integrity and who is ALIVE, day in and day out. And they've notice. All of them.

And I just love that.

Friday Thought : Leave it at the door. be Awesome.

My friend, Ron Hardy

I was in my third year of teaching, I think (maybe fourth) when much of my life was far from where I'd hoped it would be and I was beginning to struggle with confidence, joy, and purpose. Unsurprisingly, it began to impact my teaching, my classroom, and my students. Only, I didn’t notice.

Then, I somewhere around Christmas, I received an anonymous email from a student that was written from an anonymous email account informing me that I was not doing a great job, that my teaching was sub-par, and that he (I think it was a he, at least) and his classmates deserved better. Luckily, I received that email on a Friday so I could spend the weekend sulking, arguing, excusing, then finally accepting that he was right. I needed to do better. Because he and they and my colleagues and my family deserved better. And because I was better.

The following week I started writing, "Leave it at the door. be Awesome." on the bottom of every lesson plan. A few weeks in, I made it the footer to my lesson plan template which I have used ever since, reminding me each and every day I sat down to create a lesson to leave whatever struggles, issues, and frustrations I might have at the door and be Awesome.

I wasn't perfect after that, nor did I always leave everything at the door. In fact, every now and then I would gather it all in my arms, squeeze it through the door, then drop it right in the middle of the floor for all my students to see. Like the day I spent sharing memories of my childhood best friend because the night before I had discovered it was the anniversary of passing. He had been gone for almost six years, and I never even knew. We had lost touch over the years, and when I discovered he had passed away six years prior, I felt terrible, guilty, and at a loss.

I didn’t sleep much that night.

So I wrestled through it with my students, I shared some of my favorite memories, talked about how the night before I could only see so much of Ronnie in my son that I ended up holding him for almost an hour while I talked about my childhood friend, and I talked with them about loss and life and the struggle in between. Then I had them share memories of their friends and families and write brief notes to those they mentioned. It wasn't all that academic of a class, but kids referenced it for years as one of their favorite classes and, ever since, I have committed to sharing his story with whomever I can during the month of October, the month he so abruptly left this world.

Sometimes life and circumstances seem more than we can bare. Or, as Bilbo Baggins said, it can make us feeling exhausted and "thin . . . stretched, like butter, spread over too much bread."

In those moments, for me at least, it is healthy to remind myself that I am needed - by my students, my colleagues, my family, and my community. That I am bigger than my circumstances, better than what some might think or say about me, and that I am able to help and serve and do great things, even when I don't feel like it.

People need us. They need us to be great, to be better than we often feel and sometimes think. They need us to be their mothers, fathers, friends, counselors, encouragers, planners, champions, and safe places. They a need us to be Awesome. Which means, sometimes, that they need us to be vulnerable and open and raw. They need us to be human. Which is great! Because that is exactly what humans are. Awesome.

And because we are, we can also be.

Leave it at the door. be Awesome.

For more on . . .

-N- Stuff  :  Open Thoughts  :  Friday Thoughts