Friday Thought : What is the Origin?

"What's the origin?"

Oftentimes there are themes to my weeks. Be it from conversations, podcasts, books, whatever, every now and then a very specific theme arises in a short period of time. This past week the theme has been centered on how we interpret the actions of others, and more importantly, how we respond to them.

For me, it is all too easy to fill in the gaps of unknowns with assumptions. When someone says an unkind thing or acts in a somewhat offensive way, I get defensive, argumentative, and - at my worst - judgmental. I fill in what I don't know with what I assume, and falsely attribute someone's actions to their (therefore assumed) faulty character.

Yet, when I dig in, when I sit and chat and seek further understanding, I am often provided an entirely different - and much more accurate - picture of understanding.

In a recent conversation with a friend, he encouraged me to ask and consider, "What is the origin?" of someone's actions, and I have truly appreciated that perspective.

This month, the month of GRATITUDE, one way we can continue to show and pursue a grateful spirit is by appreciating the power and opportunities we have of asking, "What is the origin?"

When a child acts up or lashes out . . . "What is the origin?"

When a coworker responds with sharpness or is curt . . . "What is the origin?"

When a spouse greets us as we walk through the door with a scowl instead of a smile, consider the origin rather than jump to conclusions (Not speaking from experience . . . not at all! ;)

Oftentimes, when we seek to understand the story behind the action, we find that there is a great deal of "shtuff" happening beneath the surface and behind closed doors. When we discover more of the story, oftentimes we find that, instead of frustration, we cling to grace and EMPATHY because - just like us - their intentions were in the right place, they just didn't have the capacity to endure one. more. thing.

And in that, we can all relate.

"What is the origin?"

That’s what I’ve been thinking about this week.

Happy Friday!

#doGREATthings!

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Friday Thought : Show Gratitude; See the Gorilla

In a recent staff meeting, we watched the above video. Then, we talked about gratitude.

A few days ago, I was showing Rick - my lead custodian - the few cracks in our hallways that are in need of some attention. They aren't terrible, but they aren't perfect either. And because they aren't perfect, they can cause students and teachers alike to trip up. Their imperfection draws our attention.

However, they are just a fraction of the hallways. The bulk - almost 100% of the hallways - are great! Yet, how many times have we walked the halls and acknowledged how clean they are? How smooth and reliable they are? How beautiful and encouraging the bulletin boards are?

Not very often.

This week, I have been reminded of how quickly we take for granted the things and people in our lives who do good things, who work hard, and who are reliable, kind, and helpful. Instead of seeing and appreciating the good that is done, we get discouraged by those who are destructive. Instead of focusing on the coming opportunities, we get distracted by the task at hand and the cracks that trip us up.

We can can’t the number of passes made by those in white t-shirts but miss the gorilla.

This month, my school is focusing on the word Gratitude, and what I love about the definition is that it does not merely focus on appreciating the people and things in our lives, but the CHOICE to do so.

Gratitude is choosing to appreciate the people and things in our lives!

As we continue to work hard at completing the tasks before us, as we navigate through or correct the cracks ahead of us, my challenge to you, my staff and students, as well as myself is to not only CHOOSE to see and appreciate the people and things around us but do acknowledge them with a note.

This month, as often as possible, write down the moments, the things, and for sure the PEOPLE who inspire, encourage and support you. Who reminds you of the goodness in life. Who keeps you accountable and heading in the right direction. Who make you a better person.

Let them know they are noticed and appreciated, and that they are making a difference.

Or, as my fifth-grade teachers did, make a poster and hang it in the hallway.

That’s what I’ve been thinking about this week.

Happy Friday!

#doGREATthings!

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Friday Thought : See My Children in What I do. Then, Do Better.

I do a thing with my staff called a “Skiddy Daddle” where I give them a 15-minute break from class and spend my time reading to their students.

This most recent time, my daughter was in the class and rather quickly I noticed something peculiar about my 15 minutes. I treated the class differently. All because my daughter was sitting in one of the seats.

Which reminded me of a similar story.

A few years ago I heard a story about a world-renowned speaker who stopped inviting her mother to her speaking engagements because whenever she saw her mother in attendance, she saw herself as a daughter, not a world-renowned speaker. She wasn’t doctor so-and-so, she was Emily the daughter of her mother, and it impacted the way she spoke, the way she carried herself, and presence she commanded on stage. She acted based on how she was viewed, not on who she was.

In much the same way, I did the same when reading to my daughter’s class. I acted as how my daughter saw me, not on who I was. How I viewed me.

And that realization was deeply convicting.

When I entered my daughter’s class, I didn’t want to disappoint her. I didn’t want her friends to think I was mean or boring or whatever. I wanted them - and her - to be entertained, inspired, and encouraged. So I raised the bar on almost everything. I was more fun, more relaxed, and more interactive. I was what I normally am at home. I was acting more like a father, and it made me a better person. It made me a better principal.

Later that evening, a fellow principal - Mr. Ty Moore - encouraged me in much the same way, “See yourself as a dad,” he said, “Not merely a principal.”

For most educational leaders, this isn’t anything new. Because it isn’t. Even for me! I just forget it, at times. And every now and then, I need a good reminder of how I can improve and where I can do better. And this week, the lesson of seeing my children in the eyes of every interaction has been deeply convicting.

When speaking to kiddos or walking down the hall, how would I treat my own children?

When discussing poor behavior or inappropriate choices - when enforcing discipline - how would I engage the situation if it were my child? How would I reconcile and restore?

When talking about students with staff members, how would I talk about my own children?

When considering a child’s future and potential, how would I encourage, believe, and hope in the potential if it were my child?

If at any point the answer is something like, “Not like that,” then I need to do better.

And when I fail, just like I do at home with my own children, I need to make it right. With the student, the staff member, or the school at large. I need to acknowledge where I blew it, make it right, then do what is right. I need to do better.

Especially when I remind myself that for many kiddos in my school, I am one of the only constant and reliable father-figures in their lives. Day in and day out.

No matter how tired, how frustrated, distracted, or insecure I may feel, there are kiddos who need the best of what I can offer. And if I can muster it up for my own kids, I can muster it up for them, too.

Day in and day out, I need to do better.

That’s what has been on my mind lately.

Happy Friday!

#doGREATthings

Give. Relate. Explore. Analyze. Try.

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Friday Thoughts : Blog