My friend Eric Beard sent me this picture the other day. It’s his theme for his AP English courses. “A lot of my kids are feeling super intimidated,” he wrote, “And I’m trying to remind them that there’s a reason they’re here. That this is where they’re supposed to be,” and therefore, they need to “own it - their story, their reading and writing, their life.”
“Be the Story,” he encourages them.
And I would extend the same to you.
If you are cautious or nervous about this coming year, I encourage you to Rise Above and Be the Story!
If you are excited for this coming year, confident in who you are and role you play, I challenge you to See Beyond Yourself and Be the Story for those around you!
If you are somewhere in-between or all of the above, if you have committed yourself to helping others, I challenge you to Embrace Your Failures and Be the Story!
Here’s how.
Be the Story : Rise Above
Just like Eric Beard’s AP students, many educators are entering this year nervous, cautious, or even fearful. And for a myriad of reasons.
Whatever it is for you, own it. Call it by name, acknowledge it’s presence, then choose to Rise Above!
If it is gossip you are afraid of, you can choose to Rise Above the reality of being misunderstood and continually strive for what is good and right and true. You can choose to Be the Story of integrity and perseverance and kindness for your school and community.
If it is the prospect of failure that overwhelms you, let me put you out of your misery: you will fail! But when you do, you can choose to Rise Above the embarrassing moments and continually strive to live a life of conviction and adventure. You can choose to Be the Story of growth and resilience for your students.
If it is the memory of broken relationships that causes you to mistrust or hold back, you can choose to Rise Above the pain of disappointment and take another step, give another try, and reach for another chance of building new relationships or mending old ones. You can choose to Be the Story of grace and forgiveness for those who are watching, as well as for those who need it most.
People are going to have their opinions about you. Let them. We can’t control them any more than we can control the weather. What we can control, however, are our decisions, our actions, and the stories we provide.
Where in your life are you falling into the rut of expectations?
Where are you holding back when you should be stepping out?
Where are you allowing past narratives to control your decisions, momentum, and direction?
Whatever your answers may be, beat your fears back with a club, RISE ABOVE, and choose to Be the Story. For yourself, and for others.
Be the Story : See Past Yourself
Sometimes, the best stories in our lives are the one’s where we need help. They’re the ones where we’ve tried our best and done all we can, yet still fall short. Sometimes, the best stories are the one’s when someone else is the center. When someone else is the hero.
Like this one:
For a man who is often the center of attention, Steve Harvey’s story would not be what it is without Rich and Becky.
Sometimes, to Be the Story, we must set aside our personal dreams and ambitions for the sake of someone else’s. It means choosing others - their success, their happiness, their attention - over our own. It means risking our own comforts, advancements, even reputations for the benefit of someone else.
But only if have the strength to see past ourselves.
Think about why you became an educator. I bet a former teacher or relative, perhaps even a counselor or youth pastor comes to mind. Someone who spoke into your life, took the time out of their day to invest in your, or lived a life that inspired you. I bet you are where you are because someone else chose to see past themselves and invest in you.
Who in your life needs a little extra oomph of support? Who needs to be noticed? Who needs an acknowledgement of all that they are doing?
Who needs a few more moments of your time? An unexpected pair of extra theatre tickets, coffee, or walk around the block?
Who is the story in your life, and you’ve never told them?
Every time we interact with someone at work, home, or in public, we have the choice to either bless ourselves or embrace the opportunity to encourage another. If we choose to Be the Story by seeing past ourselves, we spend our interactions looking for ways to be generous with our time, resources, energy, and ideas. We choose to uplift another rather than promote ourselves. And in doing so, in sometimes large but oftentimes small and incremental ways, we impact lives and make a difference.
Be the Story : Don’t Waste the Failure
I have been in education long enough to know that failure is the beginning of growth and learning. I’ve also been in education long enough to know that failure is not something most educators are eager to experience. We would all rather be the story of competence and success, not the story of failure.
But failure is something we cannot avoid.
No matter our intentions, our work ethic, our education and experience, we are all prone to moments of epic failure and great defeat. And the more we try, the more we put ourselves out there and strive to do Great Things, the more likely it is we will fall on our face.
So we might as well not waste it.
Failure allows us to grow in empathy. “When anxiety increases,” Dr. Borba writes in Unselfie: Why Empathitic Kids Succeed in our World, “empathy decreases.” If we are consumed with being perfect we become so consumed with our own lives that we have very little time to think or worry about another’s. Because we fail we are able to understand the failure of others, relieving them of judgement, and opening the door for an opportunity to help.
When we’re not busy being consumed with our own selves, we notice other people in the world, people we might be able to serve. We see them with fresh perspectives. We see their fragility and their need.” - Get Out of Your Head, by Jennie Allen
Failure allows us to grow in humility. They force us to acknowledge our true weaknesses which in turn allows us to ask for help. And to the degree we are willing to stop and ask for help - to admit past or impending failure - to that same extent we will create “an environment conducive to growing and retaining productive and committed colleagues” (via). One of the most destructive ambitions in the world of education is the incessant quest to be perfect. When we embrace our mistakes we invite others into lives of transparency. When we embrace our mistakes, we help those around us grow in confidence, connectedness, and success.
Failure allows us to be better people. It helps us learn and grow for sure, but it also just makes us better people. It makes us kinder, more forgiving, understanding, and easier to approach. Failure allows us clarity to embrace where we’re great, seek help where we are not, and live in community with others. Failure is what makes us human, reminding us that we are not the center of the Great Story, but a crucial character in someone’s story. Failure is the open invitation to Be the Story, for yourself and for others.
But only if we embrace it, own it, and refuse to waste it.
As we enter this school year, with excitement, intimidation, or trepidation, I encourage you to be the kind of person who creates moments that people talk about, remember for years to come, and spend their lives attempting to duplicate.
Be someone to someone else.
Be the Story.